Are you selfish?

“Make yourself a priority once in awhile.
It’s not selfish!
It’s necessary!”

A beautiful quote that some people don’t understand. When I was younger I said:” I need some space!” I went to my room and took all the time that I needed for myself. My parents have always accepted it. And they understood that some people sometimes need their space. And it’s absolutely not selfish but it’s necessary. You need to give yourself time and space maybe to reflect or to rest or whatever you feel like at that moment. I see it already in my kids. My eldest son said that he wanted to be a little bit on his own. My youngest son didn’t understand why he wanted to play for a while alone. When I explained to my son that sometimes people need some space to breathe again for example, he understood. Now sometimes also my youngest son takes his time for himself. And that’s so beautiful to see. You don’t have to isolate you but if you need an hour or 2 to relax and need your time that’s okay. If you want to spend days and hours and years alone then it’s not really okay. Maybe if you want to write a book. You need some time to think and to write. Then you are searching for a space to be alone but maybe if you take a break you will see other people. I think the mothers sometimes have to have me time let’s say. They need to have a break to go to the hairdresser, or to have a walk, to read a book, to listen to music and do some sports. Just time for themselves without kids without a husband, only the mother! Off course me time can also be, staying with with women or something else. But I think it’s important to stay also alone without anybody. It is not selfish but it’s healthy. I have three boys at home and sometimes it’s enough for me. So in the morning I’m happy when my kids are at school and my husband is going to work and I’m taking my time to do my running or to work on my website. Breathe! That is not really taking time for yourself. Taking time for yourself is really doing absolutely nothing. Think things over! It’s like meditate for an hour or something. Clear your mind, clear your soul, clear your body! Give yourself time to put all the information that is getting into your head the whole day. Into the little boxes in your head otherwise there will be too much information together and then one day the bomb will go off. I think also that there are people who need time for themselves but they can’t because they feel guilty. That’s absolutely nonsense. You don’t have to feel guilty if you need time for yourself. I’m also guilty, I know because sometimes for me it’s difficult either to take time for myself. But now I’m still learning to do it and I will because it’s important. It’s easy when you’re single you can take any time you want but if you have a family you have a responsibility for your family. And that responsibility is also to take care of yourself. Because if you can’t take care of yourself you can’t take care of the family. There are people who are keep on going without thinking about themselves. And at a certain point they will find themselves back really hard. It is not easy sometimes to find really time for yourself, I know. Because you feel responsible for the tasks that you have during the day. And I think that there are people who are so stressed out that they need a break but they don’t have to possibilities to have a break. So also this time it is easy to say:”take time for yourself” but for some people it is really difficult. It also helps if you work together as a family. Don’t let the mother do all the stuff in the house or don’t let the father do all the stuff in the house. Work together and then you will find your time to have some space. And off course also children need to do some little tasks in the house. Don’t exaggerate because there are kids and they need to be kids also. When they’re getting older you have to teach them the responsibilities. But when they’re young maybe you can do some little tasks together and explain if you work together you have more time to play or for yourself. Sometimes it’s difficult to understand if someone needs help or not. Maybe I have a difficult character in that kind of things. Because sometimes I like to do the tasks that I have in the house by myself. I accept it already is me time. But if you would work together it goes faster and you finish it easily. Finally you have more time for yourself. That’s the beauty of people. Everybody has their own character and everybody has their own way of thinking. And you need to try to get on that same page to work together. That’s the beauty of life! If you want to work together you have to you have respect and accept other peoples opinion and other peoples character. So people who need space have to explain to people why do you need space because some people don’t understand that you need space. Is it a lack of communication maybe? I don’t know because you can also over-communicate. You need to search for the balance. The balance in life. The balance in communication. The balance in your head. The balance in your body and so on.

Take some time for yourself to get that balance back. It’s not selfish at all!
Just think about it and write to you soon!

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